Friday, December 18, 2009

"kids! what's the matter with kids these days?"

Little, Wee and I had the privilege of watching my nephew PJ perform in his school play today in Hollywood. his class represented the 60s in song and dance (very well). lauren threw together his costume this morning and he looked sensational.

PJ goes to school in hollywood, a stone's throw from the Kodak theatre & has a couple of famous classmates, and classmates with famous parents. fame is so weird, isn't it?

Little was oblivious to everything but the cool playground. and i mused as we walked back to our car: in 10 years, when Little is a teenager, will she appreciate that i had to steer her past Johnny Depp so that she could reach the tetherball?

Thursday, December 10, 2009

the goose is getting fat

last year's glitterfest was all that i hoped it would be
{i think there are still festive particles attached to my lungs}. however, i decided to stand down this year.

by that i mean minimal materials, minimal expense. i'm not taking holiday decorating any less seriously {you're funny!}. i just thought we could do without the craft table parked in the living room all month.

a little glitter here and there, a few (4) special new ornaments, some fried chicken & waffles, a whole lot of tissue paper, and we're there. no stress, no mess. it's christmas, baby!

i was told there would be candy

Sunday, December 6, 2009

pretty sure i know how this is going to end.

bim posted this anecdote on Facebook & i wanted to remember it:

As we drove up to Vons grocery store, Little looked at the big "VONS" sign and said, "Look Dad. 'Y' 'Zero' 'N' 'S': that's the word for 'We're gonna get some egg nog." And we did.

you can't imagine how much eggnog has been through this household already. not even a stomach virus could staunch its flow. how much eggnog can a little 3 year-old belly hold? some of us are trying not to find out.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

"it's my fave'rit present i ever heard!"

it happened just as i expected: Little Owly woke up 3 years old and TA DA! the mantle is upon her. it's been a glorious day so far. no whining, no screaming, no sign of 2 anywhere. nothing but please & thank you from now on.

for a morning snack (after special birthday cereal) she ate oatmeal like it was the best thing she had ever tasted in her life. probably it was, since didn't eat anything yesterday.

the decision to have a family-only party this year turns out to have been inspired. Little and i were flattened monday and tuesday with a stomach virus and wouldn't have attended any party that wasn't within running distance of the lou. how glad i was to see the color back in her cheeks this morning.

Little requested a purple birthday and we'd been planning accordingly...until i got sick. bless him, Bim carried out my plans for decorating after i went to bed {fell in a heap on the bed, to be exact}. when i woke up with Wee in the morning, i saw the living room & thought it must be my birthday. he had cleaned up our sick-day mess and added several sweet touches.

tonight there will be purple cake and purple pancakes. but no eggs {maybe ever again}.

this girl is a tiger--her words. she gave me a very tender hug just now and informed me that we are both tigers. what a charming package of traits she has: she is a fighter and a lover. her teachers at pre-school say she is usually first on the scene when her friends are sad, offering drinks of water and hugs. she is the tallest and it's very sweet to watch her put her arm around another child's neck and put her face right in their face to give comfort.

she's no fool, neither. Bim and i sometimes threaten to pinch her buns if she doesn't hurry and put her underpants on. to preempt this she now presents her little bum to us, asking for a "soft, soft pinch." still better than wearing underpants, i guess.

it seems perverse in some way to ask a 3 year-old what she wants for her birthday {welcome to materialism, baby!} but then you get answers like, "purple" and remember that you are over-thinking again. this birthday is about saying, "sure!" as much as i possibly can, and just being there with her, untied from obligations to produce something. excuse me now, as i have a hot air balloon to ride in.

a few closing words from the Birthday Girl:

lclkxklkoadakdddsk;dkdsds;[sppddsopdsdpsssssspskkkfkkf,vmvvvvvmm vvmslshshhshhshsh

= "i love you to have your birthday."

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Little's song

music overheard today:

"My birthday is Wednesday. But I said 'No, it's not.' But my Dad said my birthday is Wednesday. But NO, it's not!"

{proving that perception is not reality since 2006}

Monday, November 23, 2009

our day so far

dear allyn,

today you sang me an awesome potty song using only the lyrics, "pee pee" and "poop." later you stripped off all your clothes and used your underpants first as a hat and then wedged between your cheeks as a tail.

scissors across the wall. scissors across the room. scissors on the rug.

two hundred seventy-five times i have been asked for "kipper the dog watch" and 275 times i have said, "is it 5 o'clock yet?" but seriously, "IS IT FIVE O'CLOCK YET?!" i came THIS close to winding all the clocks ahead.

wailing, screaming, crying, flailing, repeating.


marker on the wall. marker on the box i need to return. marker on your body.

right now you're sitting buck naked at a barstool pouring salt into your palm, licking it, coughing, and pouring again. no girl of mine is going to develop a goiter.

i understand why my mom sometimes locked herself in the bathroom when we were naughty. she did it so that she wouldn't hurt us. and i'm grateful. and metaphorically, i'm writing this from the bathroom. please don't hurt Liv while i'm hiding out.

we did have fun at the library today and you did so many things that made me laugh. for the most part, Liv's naps are keeping us are using the opportunity of close quarters to test each and every limit...basically doing your job. well done, you! and if anyone is reading this, i don't want you to feel sorry for me or for her. we are both getting exactly what we need.

guess what?! it's FIVE O'CLOCK right ... NOW!

little red riding hood is in the doghouse

i am told that i'm going to go in the woods and the wolf is going to eat me and the cutter one {i.e., the woodcutter} is going to save the rat {instead of me}.
can't remember what i did wrong but boy, was it wrong.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

if she doesn't learn another thing

at least she shares my love of tape. a joy and a bond forever.

reminds me of my second favorite New Yorker cartoon, by Sam Gross.

{here's my favorite}

and if tomorrow i'm an apple seller too

i don't need anything but you.

as of tonight the apples are officially out of our house and out of our lives. it's been an experience to remember & learn from. and i am so grateful to all of you who joined in the fun.

{we made a lot of applesauce}

{and apple pie}

{and made a large delivery to the Los Angeles food bank}

{and just snacked and snacked on those tasty buggers}

there is nothing like a bountiful harvest to lead into the thanksgiving season. and yet. i declare december the month of oranges.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

the {relative} peace of wild things

i'm sorry, did you need something? i can't see you because of this giant pile of laundry.

this morning i attempted to break the cycle of laziness and gluttony that made me a less than average mom this week.
no, that's being kind. i was just a turd out there.

bim just replaced our burgled tv and we have made up for a summer without it in about two days.

i know i said a couple of posts back that halloween candy is wonderful and i stand by that. but it also slows me down considerable, and makes me stupid and squishy and sleepy. compounding the problem, Wee attempted to eat all the crayons in the house and i had to eat them myself before she could hurt herself.

a couple of weeks ago while suffering from a brief spasm of energy, i made this quick dress for Little out of fabric scraps and dishtowels. it still has a safety pin for a button and there is not now, nor will there ever be, a hem {so i guess there wasn't exactly a surfeit of energy}. she wore it asleep and awake for days and at no time during that standoff did a comb touch a hair of her head.

there have been words exchanged that i'm sure Little would like to take back. i'm sure i would {if i were her}.

which brings me to this morning. the heat seems to have broken, both literally and metaphorically. in celebration, i got up 15 minutes earlier to walk up our street alone before bim left for work. it's not ambitious, folks, but it's a start. {or a one-time thing i can look back on reverentially.} and the bomb in my brain reset to explode another day. we made it through breakfast, second breakfast, nap, second nap, a lull for self-loathing/reflection, lunch and then... {wait for it} i pulled it together and took the girls to the park. it was almost chilly. friends were there. she ran and ran and ran.

and that has made all the difference.

i hope you all have time to do a little thing that lifts you, be it ever so slightly, this week/end.
i'd love to hear about it.

Monday, November 2, 2009

threats & warnings

Little to me: "I'm gonna put you in the SKY and you're gonna SIT on a CLOUD!"

that'll teach me.

oft-heard phraseology: "I! DON'T! LIKE! THOSE! CHOICES!" & "Get out of my way!" & a personal favorite, "DON'T! PINCH! MY! BONO!"

that last one may have been legit. still, does anyone have any good recommendations for toddler charm school? i would pay money to see any old lady try to put white gloves on my miss. she shall i put it? AWESOME.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

more looky less talky

i'm more of an exhibitionist than a blogger lately. october's been a month to remember for many reasons, most notably for the passing of my grandpa clyde. it's been too big a topic to take on. until then, more pictures.

Saturday, October 31, 2009

you'll wear it and you'll LIKE IT!

it's not right the way i've been eating their candy. so i let a few things slide, like sneaky-secret candy eating from the jar she's not supposed to be able to reach. because i know.

halloween morning i woke early after a restless sleep. {shout} BECAUSE HALLOWEEN IS FUN!

{whisper} ...for the children.

i just can't resist hijacking this holiday. costumes are uber-fun. candy is wonderful. i know there are people out there who decorate their christmas trees on christmas eve and buy candy on halloween day. fine for them. i start planning costumes in march. or even, november. i try to use materials i already have around the house. the only purchase i had to make was a men's shirt with a medical logo, from Goodwill. i cut it down to sew a lab coat for Little.

but this morning, after being jangled awake by my ticking brain, i began to mentally prepare myself for the worst: i'm on my way to a chain store to buy a costume {ew} for a little girl who decided she didn't care for the TWO her mama made for her. she wants to be a scaaaaary dinosaur. curse the library and its cursed books teaching my kid to choose her own costume!

at least it won't be hard to "get" her costume. "what is she, doctor frankenstein? a mad scientist? einstein? gene wilder?" yes. all of those. my favorite was the year i went to a party dressed as hester prynne; 3 people thought i was the first letter of the alphabet.

okay, gotta go...before the dinosaurs are all gone. happy halloween!